Let’s open once again the Taboo Box of Motherhood. Precious few women will admit it, but a shocking number of us are victim to yet another unpleasant postpartum complication: painful sex. While returning to sex after baby can be a little scary, and often difficult purely because of our crazy schedules and decreased desire to do anything in bed but sleep, most women WANT to get their sex life back. Goodness knows our beloved has been anxiously awaiting this moment, and it is heart shattering to hit a wall in this area when the time comes. Women who have persistent pain with intercourse can develop anxiety and depression as well as relationship troubles due to their inability to have or enjoy sex, and often are too embarrassed to discuss it with a physician, or too busy to make it a priority.

So what causes the discomfort? Well, imagine your pelvic anatomy. The vaginal canal and uterus are surrounded by the muscles of your pelvic floor. This passageway has been through a great trauma during childbirth, and afterward can respond by clamping down in a massive muscle spasm – just like your hamstrings might spasm after running a marathon. Even women who have C-sections can suffer from this responsive muscle spasm after childbirth. In addition, with a vaginal delivery there is frequently some tearing of the skin, which may extend into the muscular wall and even all the way through the perineum to the anus, or you may have had an epesiotomy. These lacerations are stitched up and often scar tissue forms that is not very flexible and may cause significant pain when stretched, as during intercourse or bowel movements.

What can you do? You may hear that the pain is related to breastfeeding or decreased lubrication and “it will pass with time”. But if you have tried lubricants to no avail, it is time to look deeper. Pelvic physical therapists treat your painful vaginal muscles the same way we treat any other painful muscle. We assess its flexibility, tenderness and strength. We look for trigger points and scar tissue and use natural techniques including massage and gentle stretching to relax and ease the muscle spasm and help the tissue heal. We also teach you how to relax these muscles to allow you to return to enjoying intimacy with your loved one.

If painful intercourse is impacting your sex life and your relationship, do not wait another day. Visit a qualified pelvic therapist and get your sexy back!